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A thief stuck a pistol in a man's ribs and said, "Give me your money." The gentleman, shocked by the sudden attack, said, "You cannot do this, I'm a congressman!" The thief replied, "In that case, give me MY money!" Vote: share joke. Joke has 77.53 %.

Listen to me and I will perform miracles." The old woman is intent on her beads and does not look up. Michelangelo figures that she is hard of hearing, so he shouts, "I am Jesus Christ! Listen to me and I will perform miracles!" With head bent, the woman continues praying so Michelangelo shouts, "I AM JESUS CHRIST! LISTEN TO ME!".

An elderly gentleman had serious hearing problems for a number of years. He went to the doctor and the doctor was able to have him fitted for a set of hearing aids that allowed the gentleman to hear 100%. The elderly gentleman went back in a month to the doctor and the doctor said,"Your hearing is perfect.

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Selectively deaf - When you turn off your hearing aid to avoid having to talk to someone. Only Joking My ex-wife was deaf. She left me for a deaf friend of hers. To be honest, I should have seen the signs. When deaf people see someone yawning do they think their screaming? People told Beethoven he couldn't be a great musician because he was deaf. A man and a giraffe walk into a bar. After a few drinks, the giraffe falls over and dies. The man begins to walk out when the bartender stops him. "Hey, you can't leave that lyin' there. . Canon Printer Joke. A blonde called the Canon help desk with a problem with her printer. The tech asked her if she was “running it under Windows”. The woman responded, “No, my desk is next to the door. But that’s a good point. The man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a window, and his is working fine.”. All Joke.

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with a dress and yells at the old owner who is hard of hearing. "I need to dry clean my dress". The owner cups his hand next to his ear. "come again". "No it's ketchup this time". Score: 68. Share: So a guy asks me why I've been letting my grapes dry out... and so. Stop bluffing. "You must be the change you wish to see in the world.". - Gandhi. I wish people would speak up! "Never be afraid to laugh at yourself, after all, you could be missing out on the joke of the century.". - Dame Edna Everage. People with hearing loss are laughing at the joke - because other people are. We ourselves didn.

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God says, “I think I’ll call it a day.”. The Little Boy. A little boy in church for the first time watched as the ushers passed around the offering plates. When they came near his pew, the boy said loudly, “Don’t pay for me, Daddy, I’m under five.”. Too Soon for Sunday School. Your Hearing Now, Inc. Humor. Thankfully, for me a "silent night" is just a flick of the hearing aid switch away. Sfee's Sister. Hard of Hearing. Early to bed, early to rise, is a great. Take the best quizzes, play free online games, find hilarious jokes and.

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With our over 4,000 most funny jokes, ... My mother was hard of hearing and wore a hearing aid that she removed at bedtime. My dad would wait till she had put it on her nightstand and say,.

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    These funny D/deaf jokes and memes aim to give everyone a smile. Something which without, we'd all be in a much darker place. ... Being deaf or hard of hearing does not mean we have all had a humor bypass. In fact, deaf people can be among the most fun to be around, certainly when it comes to the challenges we all face on a daily basis.

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    Fred: “Now that I’m getting older I’m worried about my hair falling out.”. Barber: “Men’s hair doesn’t ever fall out.”. Fred: “I’ve seen many balding older men.”. Barber: “When men get older their hair follicles get weak making the hair fall back inside their head.”. Fred: “That’s preposterous, do.

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    Ear Jokes. A chap goes to see the doctor with salt on one ear and pepper on the other. The doctor says, “You need to start eating more sensibly”. This week’s collection of puns and one liners takes the form of ear jokes. As normal, they.

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    ASL Shirt Sign Language Hearing Aid Funny Joke Deaf Gift. 5.0 out of 5 stars 10. $19.98 $ 19. 98. FREE Shipping on orders over $25 shipped by Amazon. Eargo 5 Hearing Aids for Adults - Virtually Invisible, Rechargeable, and with Telecare Support ... Funny Hard Of Hearing Deaf Awareness Themed Calendar 2022 Cover Appointment Planner Book.

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9) The stork is the bird that. Hard Of Hearing Joke . Three retirees, each with a hearing loss, were taking a walk one fine March day.One remarked to the other, “Windy, ain’t it?””No,” the second man replied, “It’s Thursday.”And the third man chimed in, “So am I. The teller being a little hard of hearing asks "Come again?" To which she replied " No, its mustard." 👍🏼 A woman walks into a dry cleaner... and says "I've got another dress for you" The man behind the counter, whose a little hard of hearing, reply "come again?" The woman responds with "No this time its mustard" 👍🏼 Old couple in church.

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9) The stork is the bird that. Hard Of Hearing Joke . Three retirees, each with a hearing loss, were taking a walk one fine March day.One remarked to the other, "Windy, ain't it?""No," the second man replied, "It's Thursday."And the third man chimed in, "So am I.

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These funny D/deaf jokes and memes aim to give everyone a smile. Something which without, we'd all be in a much darker place. ... Being deaf or hard of hearing does not mean we have all had a humor bypass. In fact, deaf people can be among the most fun to be around, certainly when it comes to the challenges we all face on a daily basis.

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A man is talking to the family doctor. "Doc, I think my wife's going deaf." The doctor answers, "Well, here's something you can try on her to test her hearing. Stand some distance away from her and ask her a question. If she doesn't answer, move a little closer and ask again.

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This Joke Already Won! A young city girl was vacationing in the country and became friendly with a farmer boy. One evening as they were strolling across a pasture they saw a cow and calf rubbing noses in the accepted bovine fashion. "Ah," said the farmer boy, "that sight makes me want to do the same." "Well, go ahead," said the girl, "it's your.
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Funny hard of hearing jokes Write that number down. Double it. Throw the paper away. I don't have that kind of money, but I can bribe you with brownies, my delightful smile, jokes, and my friendship. Reconsider staying! Today our team is going to lose its sense of humor and its heartbeat.
Funny Short Jokes. This is what happens when thousands of people come together and share their funniest short jokes. I will never forget some of these, and you better believe my friends are hearing them. So. Funny. A plateau is the highest form of flattery. I used to think the brain was the most important organ.
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Three old ladies are walking down the street. They are hard of hearing. One: "Whew, it's windy today!" Two: "No. Today's Thursday!" Three: "So am I! Let's go to a bar! A golf club walks into a local bar and asks the barman for a pint of beer. The barman refuses to serve him. "Why not," asks the golf club. "You'll be driving later," replies the.
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Crowd – “Hearing aids!” “I broke up with my deaf girlfriend because she never listens to me.” “When deaf people fight, they let their fists do the talking.” “My ex-wife who is deaf left me for another deaf person. To be honest, I should have seen the sign”. “I am so sick of deaf people. They never listen.” “My deaf girlfriend said we need to talk.
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Jun 25, 2013 - A collection of hard of hearing comics and jokes. See more ideas about hard of hearing, hearing, jokes. Five of the Best ShortMedical Jokes. 1) Long and Short of the Problem. Adam, an elderly man. was seated in the doctor's waiting room. When he was called in to see the. doctor, Adam slowly got up, and, grasping his cane and hunching over, slowly. made his way into the examining room. In fact, without my sense of fun, at times I think I would be totally speechless because of my love of puns, jokes , and one-liners . Yet I've observed that some people are almost afraid to embrace the humor in hearing loss. I was an entertainer for 25 years, which included being part of a comedy duo doing stand up across the UK. Hearing loss, or hearing impairment, happens when there is a problem with one or more parts of the ear or ears. Someone who has hearing loss or impairment may be able to hear some sounds or nothing at all. Impairment means something is not working correctly or as well as it should. People also may use the words deaf, deafness, or hard of. Hard of Hearing An old man decided his old wife was getting hard of hearing. So he called her doctor to make an appointment to have her hearing checked. The doctor said he could see her in two weeks, and meanwhile there's a simple, informal test the husband could do to give the doctor some idea of the dimensions of the problem. "Here's what you do.
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